A day to say I Do

We are finally officially getting married. After 9 years of being together we finally have made an official plan to do so. You see we picked a date, a year from now on our original anniversary day is when we were to be “betrothed”. With one thing after another I was not sure how that was going to work out. Especially since we have two kids and we are trying are hardest to save up money for at least a down-payment on a house. That is the thing; I had been caught up in what day we did it. What year it fell on. Where is was going to be. Who was going to be there. What everyone would think or feel about it. The more I thought of everything, the more I sort of overwhelmed the situation. I know I should have just wanted to be married to the man of my life. That is all that should have mattered, right? The two of us becoming one?

Then when one of my sister-in-laws got engaged to my brother-in-law last fall, she started making all of these huge plans. You know the regular, normal; Who, What, When, where, all of it. I had got to thinking about when my man and I first got together. Back when I had said “none of it matters as long as we end up together”. I also remember telling him that I did want to wait and have a nice wedding.

When he officially purposed in 2015 I was sad. I was excited to be engaged but it did not seem like the right time. You know we already had one baby, and were on the next few steps of getting our apartment. Two or three months later we had our new place and received news that our number two was on the way. Planning a nice fancy wedding was far from our minds. People did ask all of the time about what date we picked. Or questions about any other plans they had all thought we should have already decided on. The awesome blessed feeling of starting a life together was still there but it did not really rate real high on the list at this time. This thought was based on the thought that is already what we were doing. People pushed and we pulled. To us, we were married. We are already in it for the long run so why did everyone seem so “gung ho” set on the piece of paper we just HAD to have?

Well once last September came around. He said something about our wedding, and about how he was thinking we could start putting money aside for it. Then I uttered the words “Oh you really want to marry me?” As the words left my mouth and the “no duh” look appeared on his face. I then realized it was finally feasible to start planning my wedding. I got the notebook started. Ideas loaded up. My dress found. My babies outfits all picked out. Everything hit the fan for several months. Also not being one to make a huge dramatic deal about anything, I kept the planning people to a minimum. Told my moms and my man about things but did not really talked much about it to others. Other then let a few people know about the date.

When our sister got engaged and she started making all these plans that they were planning for the month after our originally picked date. I started to feel heart broken. Not because they were excited. I was excited for them too. But between all of that and a some what “eye opening” conversation with our church leader. Whom also did not understand why we were waiting so long when we were just being united as an “official team”. I started to realize and remember that I do not really care so much about all this other fancy added stuff. At least not anymore. I prayed long and hard about the wedding for weeks. Weeks and weeks. Researched and read a bunch of things but this really hit me so hard. Everything that happened after these few events were really starting to help me see things for truth.

We have a goal to start buying a house. Hopefully this year. With a BIG “spendy” wedding, we could potentially have to put off trying to buy right now, yet again. We would rather put that money towards a house then into just one day. Yes, it is one of the biggest days of our lives. Yes, our lives will change a little. But we do not mind going simple and small. We just want to be married. He has always told me, its whatever I want. We can do whatever I want. I finally asked him what He wants. His reply was simple, “I just want to be married to you.” Hearing those words come out of his mouth cut me to the core. I realized none of it should matter at all. Even though it is just a piece of paper (to me), even though I always thought we would go big. It does not matter. Finally after praying for another few days about it, I received an answer. Hey, we could just “elope”. (Side note, NOBODY will let me call it that anymore because we are planning a few weeks ahead.)

It made sense. Like total sense. I all of the sudden was excited about it again. I had such a peace about the whole situation. When I asked God to confirm it was answer from Him. I asked for my three confirmations. I have said before at least three confirmations for me was enough for me to know it was truth. I got five! Five official God given confirmations. One was finding a decent date soon that could work for us and our parents. Two was the perfect peaceful conversation with my man about all of it. Three was telling the sets of parents. Four was my dress getting here in time. Five was booking the church & asking the pastor if he would do us the honor of performing our ceremony. All of it landed perfectly. All in a row, like dominoes. 🙂

My man and I were meant to be. We are perfect for each other. We have always been in a place of Love. Even through our difficult times, we grew together instead of apart. Soul mates-not sure how I feel about this term yet, but it is fitting right now. We are in love and ALWAYS have been. I do not know why I thought “waiting until the right time” mattered at all. Technically we should have waited to have babies obviously until marriage but with that ship having been sailed almost 7 years ago, it seems silly to wait on the marriage now, huh?

What matters is that we will be unbreakable after this point. I can feel it in my heart. This day WILL make us stronger. I also truly believe it will open so many doors for us. We will have a new life, a better life after this point here. I can not explain why I know this, but I do.

Needless to say. I am officially SO excited about this whole entire situation. Last night a few bumps got thrown in. But I know it is just an attack from the enemy and I know how to battle those now. I also know that things will work out the way God intended, because I already gave it to Him. He gets to be in control now. Not the enemy.

With all of that being said; My fiance and I are getting married next month! Not very many people know. I am sure as the next few weeks unfold that might change. But our intentions will not. We will OFFICIALLY be Mr. And Mrs. Phillips. I could not have asked for a better answer to any & all of my prayers. Only God knows how perfect this is for both of us.

Love you all! Have a great week. Will be out of town this Friday so unsure of an article yet but whether I write one or not, come by and check out some of my other articles. Some of the most recent ones have been really good. 🙂

More Unique Advice Every Wednesday and Friday at 6pm. Don’t forget to follow our page on Facebook and to share our posts on all your favorite social media accounts. (Our Facebook Page: Unique Advice ) Remember we can all stand to learn something New.

“And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.”
Romans 8:28 NKJV

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7 NKJV

“Walk in wisdom toward those who are outside, redeeming the time. Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one.”
Colossians 4:5-6 NKJV



Categories: Advice Column, Life Advice, Love, peace

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