Unexpected Peace

For those of you who know me, you know hard it is for me when things do not go the way I have planned them. It took me a REALLY long time to accept the things I could not change. It is still something I have overcome but I still struggle with it every once in awhile.

We have only taken our two babies fishing, roughly three times since it has been the four of us. The first time was OK, our youngest stayed in the car and played and our oldest ran around and discovered things. It was OK. But the second time we took them out, was one of the worst fishing experiences. Neither kid wanted to listen, both cried like 90% of the time we were out there. I was so set on my son catching his very first fish but he would not sit long enough to do so. Everything was a disaster. The worst part was we went with other people, I did not like having everything fall out from under us. I hated the thought that maybe people wouldn’t understand and it wasn’t what I wanted at all. I cried, we fought, we packed up and went home. I felt awful for weeks after that. Vowing that we would never take our kids fishing again. Little dramatic at the time but I was sooo upset.

Months later we finally set up time to take them fishing. Everything was wrong from the get. Things took forever to get together, the store trip for snacks took forever. (I have a very chatty husband.) But then once we finally got everything together, gas, snacks and supplies. We got on the road to head out. I turned on the radio. The youngest baby fell asleep and the oldest was soo happy we finally got to do something as a family. That’s when it truly sunk it. I found myself being upset that nothing had been going right all day. I was expecting everything to run smoothly, I was expecting my kids to be good and happy. I was expecting everything to go the way I wanted it to. But I realized in that moment that I was doing the same thing I do every time.

Instead of being happy that we all could go out together and that things finally lined up so we could go out. Instead of basking in the blessings, I was caught up on what was going wrong. I decided then, that expecting the kids to be good and totally love it, expecting everything to go smooth and efficient, expecting to catch fish. All of those things are out of my control. Every single aspect of what I was expecting, was not for me to control. I prayed about it. My oldest and I had a nice chat. I decided on the way there, that no matter what happened while we were out there, that I needed to stop expecting and start enjoying. Enjoying everything for what it was instead of dwelling on what it was not.

We finally got to our fishing spot. Ever one got out, I got put the string that would tie our youngest to my hip so she wouldn’t wonder off too far. She lost it, she bawled for literally 20 minutes. It was pathetic. Our oldest ran around forever and would only stop to hold his fishing pole for a couple minutes at all. Which was progress from last time, let me tell you. Wind was blowing real good, it was cold, youngest wanted back in the car and after the oldest got mad, he did too. I can’t tell you how much I was still enjoying the trip. My husband got to fish a little, I got to fish with a tiny little kiddie fishing pole. Nobody caught anything. But I was so happy. We were so blessed to even have the ability to go out there in the first place.

For months we only had a three seat pick up so the four of us couldn’t go places together really. Then we finally bought a car this year and it started acting up and didn’t want to do much. We were blessed with the car, we were blessed with the ability to fix it AND we were blessed with the ability to all go fishing together. It was all a total miracle. So instead of being upset that nothing was going “right”. I needed to be aware that everything before and after that point was a blessing. 100% blessing.

It is not good that I let the little things the last few times be in the way of my joy instead of being joyful of what we were blessed with. I learned a crucial thing yesterday. I’ve learned it before but it had not smacked me in the face until yesterday.

Unique Advice For Today: “Do not focus on all the things that are going wrong. Let go of the expectation that everything must go flawlessly. Realistically, nothing goes perfectly. Focus on the blessings that brought you to where you are. Focus on the daily blessing that are a part of your reality.”

It is not an easy thing to think about. Its not easy to do. It is such an awesome thing to realize. This post is being cut short today, for reasons I can not even begin to explain. So many blessings all around us. We just need to focus on the good.


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