The new computer I was blessed with is very interesting. I did not think I was going to enjoy it at all. But the more I discover in it and the more I customize on it, the more I find myself completely loving this. There are not many times where I am capable of actually enjoying the amazing blessings we have been blessed with.

Mostly I feel guilty, any time we are actually able to enjoy something. In case it is a surprise to some of you, there are people in this world who do not get “things”. There are people struggling everyday. Some for food, For water, some for life itself. Being very aware of this, it is difficult for me to want things. Especially things I do not need. There is just so many other things that could be done with the resources we’ve received. I just don’t have the “want” to purchase fun things for myself. But I also can’t afford to try and fix everything for other people. Its my job to take care of my family. Its my responsible to buy them the things they need. Food, clothing, toys, things they both need and if at all possible things they don’t really need too. A few toys here and there wouldn’t drain our funds only if it’s invested wisely. Things for myself do not rank high on the list of things we need. Nor does it leave emergency funds. Ideally I would be able to afford the things my entire family, extended included, needs, will need, and would just like to have. Its not my job to do so. Its not my job to “help” EVERYONE around me. Its not our job to make everyone around us happy. The things that are in our power to do, we should be thrilled to bless another person with.

Honestly, I would choose to  spend my time, money and all of my energy to make every single person around me happy. But that is not really what I should be focusing all of my everything on.

My husband has told me for many years; “You can’t make EVERYONE happy, its impossible.” I have had a really hard time with that. Though the bible says , We can do ALL things through Christ who gives us our strength; I have a really hard time believing God wants us to make “everyone” happy, all of the time. Its hard for me to say that. But I believe it could be true.

Every person around you wants or requires something different of you. Constantly daily, you have choices, and conversations, influences left and right. Still a whole little family to tend to.

Yet your friend wants you to be angry at someone you don’t even know. The neighbor wants a ride to the store. Your brother wants you to write an important email for them. Your kids want pizza, but just the kind with the yellow fruit on it. Aunt Claire wants you to make a potato salad for the family dinner tomorrow. The bakery down the street is expecting you to pick up a cake for your Boss. You still have to pick up the kids from soccer practice and the proofs that needed turned in by 6 are still sitting on the printer at home. The thing of it, is you can’t possibly make all of those people happy at the same time.

You do not have time to get wrapped up in another persons drama. So your friend might just need to deal with their own situation. You can’t possibly take the neighbor down town and hit the bakery at the same time. Your job, has to come first. Especially if you are going to get the proofs in on time, all with one stone. You have enough money to grab a pizza on your way to get the kids, and it will save time on dinner. So done and done. All on the way to soccer practice. Your brother might need to find someone else to write their own email. Aunt Claire might not care if you can’t bring the salad, but we all know we can make time. As long as you can prioritize and seek out which requirements are an acceptable, productive use of your time, most unending lists are not hard to sift through.

It’s the guilt and stress piling up on top. All the situations come with their own amount of emotions , whether good or bad. We can’t allow ourselves to be robbed of the excitement of enjoying something that was blessed to us. When we focus on the fact that we didn’t give our neighbor a ride, it ruins the enjoyment we will have getting to sit and eat pizza with the kids. Especially after a longs day work.

I want to be able to enjoy my life. I want everyone to be able to enjoy their life. I wish that the things that were required of those around us would come with a number in which it should be prioritized into our lives. It would be so much more simple if things worked that way. Unfortunately we have to do what is “within” our power to do. It is our own job to make a list, number it, equation it all out, and visualize things the way they need handled. I pray that everyone receive the gift of discernment; That everyone seek the answers they need to run a productive life.

~Cavebaby~

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